It's back to school time and that means going off to school for the first time for lots of kids. So today I'm reviewing the thoughts and feelings I've had at different points of commencement in my life. What about you? What have your feelings been?
Two instances in my life come to mind. The first was leaving high school, and going "off to college" and the second was leaving home, and moving to California because I had one of those "wanna get away?" experiences.
When I went to college, I had memories and experiences from high school to cherish but leave behind, and I had new experiences ahead of me. Part of me looked forward to these new experiences and part of me really really missed what I was leaving behind (my high school friends, my baby nephew, parents, sisters, grandparents, cousins, and my church family), everything that was comfortable for me. And yeah I was 18 years old but wait I was ONLY 18 years old!!! An adult and a kid.
Although I wasn't as far from home as some, I was still not home. And this was 1990, so any cell phone calls in my family were made by my dad and the cost was probably $9.99 a minute or something crazy like that. At one point I was so desperate to call back home (transparency warning), that I made calls on the phone at my job in the computer center and lost my job because of it. Nowadays when kids move away, they can connect back home via cell phone as much as they want, they can talk, text, share videos of family and friends in an instant via email, Youtube, and even videos on the dog on cell phone. We didn't even have email back then.
BUT, I know that doesn't make it easy okay? It's still hard. Some of the things that transcend changes in culture and advances in technology are the things that we choose to do with the new season we're in.
As I said, this is the first of two experiences I'll share. So what can one do when they're at the beginning of such a season. We know that "it'll be over before we know it" as the saying goes, but the reality is that, "It's not over now. I'm just at the beginning of it and it seems like it's going to last forever." Sometimes you wish you could just go back to the season you were in before (high school, back to the city you moved from, or whatever the case is).
Here are some things that helped me with this first experience (going to college). Would you share some that helped you too?
1. Connect through laughter
Have fun! We know that laughter is medicine for the soul. I don't know about you but, no matter what's going on, even with me and Jeoff and when we are in the most stressful conversations, a big laugh can so take our minds off the pain and bring great joy. Some of my greatest memories from that season of my life are laughing and talking to my room mate, Drena. And before going to bed at night or when I became lonely I could reach into that bank of laughter, along with all the funny memories from home, and it would take the hurt off of my current moment of difficulty. Now almost 20 years later (Oh Lord), Drena & I still reminisce on those times and can remember entire lines of conversations we had and jokes we told.
"Yeah, I can have fun with friends, watch a funny show or video and be happy then but that only lasts so long."
You can also
2. Connect through service
Find someone to give to. There are countless people who can attest to the fact that doing something for others is quite fulfilling. That's not why I listed it though. If it's all about being fulfilling (for you) then it's less about being for someone else. Service is about taking our focus off of our own needs and concentrating on the needs of another. Are there children in the surrounding community who would love to hear the story of a college student and look to them as some what of a role model? or some would like to have a storybook read to them? is there someone you could write a letter to and it would brighten their day to hear from you?, does someone need help moving into their dorm (I think the new term is residence hall)?, what else can you do that someone else cannot do?
"I see, I'll look into that, but although it's not ALL about me there are some things I do need to do for me right?"
Right...
3. Connect to your gifts
Writing, playing an instrument, singing? I wish I had done more of that during this season. Take advantage of it and see where you can go with it. I don't mean how far you can go, meaning impressing other people with it. I mean how far can you go learning what you can learn what you can do. Look forward to the time when you can look back and see year from now, how you went from being okay at it, to being really good at it!
"Cool!"
And/or
4. Connect through student organizations
Allow the Lord to develop you as a young adult. In addition to the opportunity to make the most of the academic courses you're in, college campuses have so many opportunities for students to be involved. Whether it's sports, leadership organizations, clubs, choir, drama, ....it's there waiting for you. There are some who were involved in two or three or more of these. And most of them will never regret their involvement. For me, these were the things that God used to challenge me to become the person I am today. In them, I saw people who were different from me (in good and bad ways) and I made decisions to better myself as a result, I had to work hard to be accepted (or not care if I was accepted). And later see what acceptance is really all about. Which leads me to number four.
"Ok gotcha there, I can do something like that, but that's only when I have time to do it."
There's something you always have time to do...
5. Connect with the Father
As one of my wise sisters told her son (in so many words), "when you get back to your room be sure to go to your Bible and look and let God show you how He wants to speak to you during this season.
During this season of my life (in college), God showed me who I was inside and who He wanted to make me. It wasn't perfect, it wasn't easy, it wasn't popular, but it was what He had to do. No, that part of my journey didn't make me a person who always made the best decisions or a person who always pleased the Lord but it did teach me about how to walk with him. I'm still learning about that but this season was my introduction to it. And that's really what this life in Christ is about. Through the Joys n Pains, the most important thing we can do is walk with the Lord. If you want to know more about what that means and how you actually do that, ask Him and He'll show you. There's also a great (FREE) book to read to learn more about it. You can even read it online.
He wants us to see him, not as the person who is watching to see if we'll do right or wrong, but the one who truly knows us and loves us and who is right there at every moment we need him.
All of these are important and I pray that if you're reading this and you're in this season that as you put whichever of these into practice you feel led to, you would allow Him to walk with you through each one.
If you're past this season, how was it for you? When you moved from one season to the next and had to experience a commencement. Please share! Leave a comment. Post it on your blog. Share any encouraging words with someone who might be at the beginning of such a season right now.
Part two "So You Wanna Get Away," coming soon.............
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